The only thing I’ve found that is less than desirable is actually climbing out of bed when it is still dark outside. Other than that, morning runs are great. 

Update on training… Training has officially begun. I’m still a couple of weeks ahead of the schedule and I’m doing well. I can run 2 miles with only a one minute break and I’m sure I could do without the break. I’ve run as many as four miles, but I thought I would die during that run. Hopefully, I’ll continue to see improvement.

In February I was challenged to train for a half marathon with Team in Training, an endurance training organization raising money for blood cancer research. I went to the sign-up meeting and was inspired by the stories of cancer survivors and of others who had trained and completed their individual races. I filled out my form, paid my registration fee and set out toward my goal.

After the Kick-Off Party on February 9th, I was pumped. I bought new running shoes, $60 running pants and other running gear. I completed my training runs that week and timed my “magic mile” to determine my pace group. 13:30. I was embarrassed and ashamed that I was that out of shape, but I was committed to my goal of  running a half marathon.

Ha!

Just 5 days later I had a full-blown case of the influenza A and missed my first training run. By the following week I was feeling better and ready to meet my group for the training run on Saturday morning. My body wasn’t fully recovered and trying to run four miles after being sick was more than I could handle. OK…so there’s more to this four mile run– it was 30 degrees outside and raining. My body was weak and I couldn’t keep up with my pace group. I was already in the “slow” group and was definitely the “slow” girl in the “slow” group. I was the poster child for “SLOW.” 

That run was absolutely miserable and I actually had to turn around and walk back to my car. I was defeated and ashamed of my lack of fitness. I still wanted to accomplish the goal of running a half marathon and tried to keep up my training schedule. But, after breaking out with shingles (again) and another stomach virus, I was done. I gave up and stopped running altogether. 

The truth is, I always knew that I wouldn’t complete the half. Why? Because that’s what I do. I set a goal, do all the “fun” work… buying the gear, paying the fee, going to meetings… but when it comes to actually doing the work when things get hard, I quit. Honestly, I was so sure that I wouldn’t complete my goal, I didn’t send out my letters to raise the money I was required to raise for the actual event. I didn’t want to have people supporting me if I was just going to quit. I really set myself up for failure. 

The desire to become a “runner” didn’t go away. I still wanted to run. I wasn’t sure why, but the desire was still there. So, about 6 weeks ago I started running again. I began following the TNT training schedule from the spring…though maybe a little less aggressive. After six weeks, I’m “running” about 6-7 miles a week… this week I’ll actually hit 12 miles for the week. AND, my “magic mile” time is 11:27. That’s over 2 minutes faster than in February!! 

[I feel like I should stop here and tell you that running is subjective. My running consists of segments of running followed by a minute of walking. Currently, I am running 5 and walking 1. Though I have actually completed 2 miles without stopping.]

The TNT Kick-Off Party is on Sunday. I will register for the San Antonio Rock ‘N Roll Half Marathon on November 16. Even as I type this, I wonder if I can actually accomplish this goal, or if I will quit when it gets hard. I’m meeting a friend for a 4 mile run in the morning and I’m nervous. Will I be able to accomplish the goal? Or, will I quit? Will I rise to the occasion and do life differently, or will I continue to allow myself to not reach my goals? 

I will accomplish this goal…

I’m beginning to see a LOT of similarities in the physical training involved in this “running” process and the spiritual training involved in the Christian life. I often quit on my goals of spending time with the Lord, making HIm the focus, giving up the things of the world in order to gain Christ. 

I’m praying that as I’m on this journey toward my goal of running a half, I’ll learn much about my walk with the Lord. I’m praying that my runs will be a time when I can meet with the Lord and spend time with Him. I’m praying that I’ll see growth and progress that will give me the encouragement and strength to keep going. I’m praying that even in the hardest times, I’ll rest and trust the program…and in life I’ll trust my God. 

Praying…and training…

After a good night’s sleep and a great run this morning, I was ready to spend some time taking pictures of places I used to go as a kid. (BTW…the sun rose at 4:48 this morning! Maine is so far east in the time zone, the sun rises REALLY early…)

Welcome to Caribou!

My last home in Maine-- 2nd and 3rd Grade

I started taking roller skating lessons at this rink when I was just 2 1/2.

The booming Caribou Theatre

The Caribou Pool... I have fond memories of the pool... though every memory includes shivering. Even in the summer it's too cold to swim.

This is the potato field I played in as a kid. My BF from elementary school lived in the house behind the trees. Her parents owned the farm.

The view from my mom's house.

Home Sweet Home! This is where I'm staying this week.

Well, whatever the reason… things are a changin’. I’m back in the blogging world.

Stay tuned. I leave in just 38 hours for a week long trip to Caribou, Maine. Yep… that’s right. Caribou, Maine. My old stomping grounds. Over the next week I plan to visit all the places I lived as a kid, go see my great grandmother’s farm house, attend the annual Potato Blossom Festival, visit extended family that I haven’t seen in YEARS, and just spend time with my mom. I’m sure I’ll have lots of stories to share.

When I get home I’ll be in desperate need of a trip to Target and Starbucks. Both are about a 3 hour drive from my mom’s house…

Peace out.

L – “I even jumped off the diving board.”

Me – “You did? Wow! I didn’t know Mamade had a diving board.”

L – “Not anymore. She took it somewhere else.”

Me – “Oh, well. Was it fun to jump off the diving board?”

L – “YES! I jumped and I swimmed all the way across the pool.”

Me – “Wow!! You’re just like a fish!”

L – “NO! Fish don’t have feet!”

Pause for lots of laughter…

L – “Fish can’t jump off diving boards…”

I love my job!

i am: grateful for new life.

i think: flip flops are the greatest invention.
i know: the location of every Target store in a 10 mile radius.
i want: a pink VW Beetle convertible.
i have: the best friends.
i wish: I could see my sister every day.
i hate: I can be so lazy.
i miss: my sister.
i fear: not growing in my relationship with the Lord
i feel: melancholy today.
i hear: the news right now.
i smell: chlorine. 
i crave: mexican food
i search: for my purpose in life and work.
i wonder: what life would look like without Christ.
i regret: so many choices in my past…but…
i love: Christ and what He has done in my life.
i ache: for complete freedom from sin…heaven…
i care: about my friends.
i always: choose mexican food.
i am not: financially wise…yet.
i believe: Christ is EVERYTHING.
i dance: in my dreams!
i sing: children’s songs all day.
i cry: A LOT.
i don’t always: follow the speed limit.
i fight: rarely…I’m a peace keeper.
i write: poetry.
i win: 
i lose: earrings…all the time. 
i never: like being late.
i confuse: need and want all the time. 
i listen: to talk radio. I know…I’m getting old.
i can usually be found: with a few kiddos in tow. 
i am scared: of being single forever.
i need: discipline in becoming healthy.
i am happy about: being three years old in the Lord.

This makes the job worth it!

(I have to admit…I’m not supposed to have seen this note yet. Mia left the post card on the counter with my name on the back. I saw my name and turned it over to find this note. After I scanned it , I put it back and just asked her about it later. She said she wanted my address so that she could mail it to me.)

When I made my way to Mia’s room and found her reading her Bible. She was reading a devotional in her Girls of Faith devotional Bible, and asked if she could finish before we started her bedtime routine. Of course, I allowed her to do so.

After she finished, I asked her what she was reading. ”About shame and asking for forgiveness.” she said.”Oh…was it talking about Adam and Eve after they had eaten of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil?” I asked. I had seen that her Bible was open to the book of Genesis. ”Yes, ” she answered.

“Cool. I love seeing you read your Bible.” I commented.I started downstairs and realized she wasn’t behind me. I called her name and she came running down the stairs.

“Sorry.” She said. “I was praying.”

“Oh, great! About what?” I asked.

“Well, I think I hurt a friend’s feelings at school, and I feel really ashamed.” Mia said. We continued to talk about what had happened, about shame and  about forgiveness. She told me that she had already asked her friend to forgive her, but that she still felt really bad about it.

Over the next few minutes she said her tummy hurt because she felt bad about hurting someone’s feelings. We talked about forgiveness and the fact that when we ask Jesus to forgive us we are forgiven immediately and our sin is moved as far as the east is from the west. We talked about how glad I was to see her tender heart toward others and that it hurt her to know that she did something that hurt someone else. But, mostly, we talked about God’s forgiveness…how complete, immediate and sufficient it is.

When we finished talking, she was smiling from ear to ear. She said, “I just feel so good. I know that I’m forgiven and I know that it’s done. I just feel like jumping all around.” Wow…how often do I respond that way to God’s forgiveness? When am I completely overcome by the complete and total forgiveness I have in Christ. Why do I continue to punish myself for the things I’ve done when Christ says, “you’re forgiven.” May I grow to have that type of childlike faith…What God says is true!

Then, I came into work this morning to this note…